What Boys Should Hear from Their Mommas

In the Tree House: Things a Young Man Should Know (via Mom)

By: Samantha S. Daviss

As a mother of only boys, I thought this article to be very apropos for me, personally. So if you have a boy, expecting a boy, or even if your boy is a grown man, I thought this was a great article.

For those of you with only girls, I am sorry, I am not able to think like a “girl mom”, as my brain doesn’t work that way. My brain can only handle dirty rooms, dirty clothes, dirty socks, stinky bath towels, sports balls, bats, gloves…well, you get the idea.

As usual I read this fantastic article, but of course I am going to put my personal spin on it for you all to enjoy, from my point of view.

I dedicate this to my three fantastic boys whom I love with my entire heart and soul; you guys make my world spin.

Starting with #20….

20.       Remember to call me….I just might be missing you.

19.       Please choose your spouse wisely….for many reasons of course. But mainly because she will be the gatekeeper to me spending time with my grand children.

18.       Don’t marry too young…you may think you’re ready but you’re not. I think 30 is a great age. You’ve got all the curiosity and wonderment out of your system.

17.       It’s ALWAYS better to be kind, rather than right all the time.

16.       Bringing her flowers for no reason…always a great idea! But remember; don’t expect a thing in return.

15.       Be a good, strong, solid leader and I promise one day others will follow your example. Peer pressure is a bear.

14.       The reason they are called “private parts” is because they are private. You don’t need to scratch them or brag about them in public.

13.       No matter your age, I will still hunt you down if you don’t say “yes ma’am” and “yes sir”. They both go a really long way.

12.       Respect her…a woman can do anything you can do. And that includes a successful career while nursing and changing diapers at 3 A.M.

11.       Be strong, but love with your whole heart, too.

10.       Take pride in your work, your appearance, and your upbringing.

9.         Treat women with mutual respect and kindly. Forever is an awfully long time to live alone, and an even longer time to live with someone who hates your guts.

8.         Knowledge and education can never be taken away from you. Cherish them, and let them carry you far.

7.         Don’t ever be a bully. Remember son, you are far from perfect. And don’t ever pick a fight, you are better than that. But if someone ever clocks you….defend yourself.

6.         Pray and be a great spiritual leader.

5.         Something every young man should be introduced to. Son I would like you to meet:

                        a) The dishwasher

                        b) The oven

                        c) The washing machine

                        d) The iron

                        e) The toilet bowl brush

                        f) The vacuum

                        g) And the mop and broom

            Now please feel free to go use them at anytime.

4.         Save your money while you’re young. I promise someday you’ll need it.

3.         Always make sure you use good aim when you go to the bathroom, someone has to clean it up.

2.         You are the one that will set the tone for an intimate relationship. So know what you are doing when you are doing it…don’t take something away from her that you can’t give back.

1.                  Play a sport, any sport. Don’t let people pressure you into playing “the most popular” sport. But sports teach you how to win honorably, lose gracefully, honesty, integrity, how to work with others, and it will keep you out of trouble if you’re truly are focused.

And the one thing I, personally, always tell my boys…

You aren’t better than any one person in this world. Stay true to who you are, believe in yourself, and always treat others with respect.

However, my latest mantra to my little men is a wonderful message. And I have to attribute hearing it from a wonderful person, leader, and role model, and that is Ms. Robin Roberts from Good Morning America.

Her mother always told her to make sure her “messes left a message”. And I absolutely love that for my boys. Because that is all I want them to learn from life. They will have ups and downs, and they will make a mess of things (or have a mess made of their life for them)…but I want them to walk away having learned something from each and every situation…pull the message from it.

Boys, like girls, are complex creatures…but if they have a few straight-forward rules to lean on, it will make life and growing up just a little easier on them.

Don't Fail at Marriage (Part II)

In the Tree House: Don’t Fail at Marriage (Part II)

By: Samantha S. Daviss

Sorry for the delay, I know I promised to have Part II out on this article during Valentine’s Week, but 2 of my 3 babies, came down with strep…so my number one job kicked in, Mommy.

But I hope you enjoyed my last column on not failing at your marriage. As I said before there are so many factors that can keep a marriage alive, and so many factors that can’t kill a marriage. I think if you are aware of all (or a majority) of those factors, you’ve won have the battle. I realize there are things in a marriage that sometimes are just predetermined like adultery, abuse, alcoholism (Wow, look at that the 3 A’s)…but then there are some things that can be controlled and repaired.

So I wanted to finish off the list that I acquired, and tweaked from the article I read a few weeks ago.

Starting with #5, since that’s where we left off…

5. Don’t stop holding your spouse’s hand.

            When you first started dating and courting each other, you probably always held each other’s hands. But as time has passed and kids have entered, the need or desire to hold hands has passed. Don’t make excuses like your hand is hot or you are uncomfortable doing it in public; keep the passion alive.

            Another Angle:

            Keep holding their hand in the car, in the movies, on the sidewalk. It bodes well for you both and for your kids.

6. Don’t stop trying to be Attractive.

            Why would you stop trying? My motto has always been, once you “catch them” you have to work twice as hard to keep them and to keep their eyes from wandering. But not only do you need to stay attractive on the outside, but the inside as well…stay the course, remain that person your spouse married. Don’t become a nag, or lazy, or ungrateful. Keep “wooing” each other.

            Another Angle:

Keep your best foot forward throughout your marriage. Stay desirable. And don’t just doll yourself up if you are going out for a night on the town with friends, do it all the time…because that person lying in bed with you is way more important than those you just spent the last 4 hours with for a night on the town.

7. Don’t Always Point out the Other’s Weaknesses.

            Don’t fall into the trap that you feel it’s okay to point out their undesirable attributes or quirks, or tell them where or how they could be a better person. Remember you are NOT perfect by any means…and when you point a finger, you have three more pointing back at you. But that doesn’t mean you can’t discuss something the other person is doing that may be bothering you. Just communicate nicely.

            Another Angle:

            Don’t say anything. There is always more than one right way to do most things; and realize that imperfections of others are too beautiful to try and change.

8. Don’t stop cooking for eachother.

            When you are dating you typically cook for that person to show them you care, and that you are a good home maker and able to take care of them forever (or if you are a guy you are trying to woo her and impress her). Keep that love and devotion alive; don’t start brining in take-out or throwing chimichangas in the microwave. First of all eating out is expensive, and the other is just unhealthy.

            Another Angle:

            Make cooking a priority, do it as a couple or as a family. Use it as time spent together, not a force of nature. And remember…meat in a can is NEVER awesome!

9. Don’t yell at your spouse.

            I’m not talking about angry yelling (although that’s not good either), I’m talking about lazy yelling. The kind you do when you don’t want to get your rear end off the couch, so you yell upstairs or into the kitchen to get their attention. But that sort of yelling sounds degrading and authoritative.

            Another Angle:

            Go find them to get what you needed from them, and while you’re there…give them a kiss to seal the deal.

10. No name calling.

            It doesn’t have to be words like “stupid” or “idiot” it can be words like “stubborn, impossible, or hard to deal with”. That too is name-calling. It is hurtful and can really cut people to the core. So weigh your words before you let them fly.

            Another Angle:

            “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” Best rule in the world…could be why it’s the Golden Rule. If you ever get to the name calling point…here’s an idea….call a time-out, for as long as you need, regroup and come back to the conversation. And those new names had better be “super sexy” or “my hotness”…and guess what…”I’m sorry” works great too.

And this last one is mine...

11. Say what you mean, and mean what you say.

            Don’t throw idle threats around. If you mean it, then say it; but if you are saying it for a “shock factor” your bluff just might get called. Don’t throw words around like “you’re crazy” or “divorce” or “you’re not who I married”. If you want a divorce then say it and do it…that is a very serious and heavy word; don’t say it if you don’t mean it. We all lose it sometimes, that’s to be expected; and sometimes we don’t like each other, also to be expected…but that doesn’t mean you want what you have built together to end.

            Another Angle:

            Tell them you aren’t happy with what just happened. Tell them you need to talk it out and hear both sides of the situation. But don’t threaten them with divorce unless you are willing to march your butt down to the lawyer’s office and file!!

A lot of this column is from my heart. The section headers are taken from those I found in the article, but the rest is from me. So understand I am not a psychologist, just a woman who has lived life; been in the trenches, and reached the highest mountain peaks all in the same lifetime, and survived to talk about it.

Part I...Don't Fail at Marriage

In the Tree House: Don’t Fail at Marriage…    

Part I

By: Samantha S. Daviss

I read the most fascinating article the other day; and it really triggered something in my head. I realize most marriages fall apart because of financial struggles or disagreements; or because of extramarital affairs; but they also fall apart because they lack luster.

When you travel down this road, some couples make the subconscious decision that this is just how marriage is…it’s all about the kids, there’s no time for themselves; or the kids have moved out of the house so the “empty nest” syndrome kicked in. But there are no excuses for letting your marriage go by the wayside…because like I always tell myself and my husband… “If this [meaning us] isn’t working; then none of this [our family and our lives together] don’t work.”

So just remember that we all need to put as much time and effort into our marriages as we do, our hobbies, our kids, our friends, or our jobs for that matter; because after all it is the most important relationship you will ever have. And yes it does take work and effort, but so does everything in our lives, so don’t expect it to be roses all the time, if you are willing to put in the time.

Here are some key points I picked up from the article I read that I thought were helpful in general across the “marriage board”. This is definitely going to be a “two-parter”, but I thought it very apropos right here at Valentine’s Day.

1. Don’t Pressure Each Other.

Pressuring each other about anything is a recipe for resentment. You know who the person was when you married them, so accept them for who they are and their flaws. There is always pressure for someone to make more money, to not mess up in parenting, to not slip in their religion. None of us are perfect, and remember what pressure you are putting on them, they are feeling 10 fold.

Another Angle:

Celebrate your different views and compliment your spouse’s different way of doing things…remember your way isn’t always the best.

2. Don’t Label Each Other with Negative Labels.

We all get a little lazy and sometimes some of the most common phrases in a marriage are “you should have,” “you aren’t” or “you didn’t”. And it’s inevitable that each of those phrases are followed with some negativity.

Another Angle:

Try to stop yourself before you say those phrases, and switch them to “you are great at”, “you are”, and “you did”…and then follow it with something positive. The noblest struggles become far more conquerable. And you don’t think or believe that you’re a schmuck, which is always nice.

3. Don’t Skip out on Things that are Important to Her/Him (the opposite sex).

It is so easy to reason in your mind, that “oh that is lame…we can find something we both enjoy doing”. There will always be some things that the other person enjoys doing that you don’t but that is no excuse or reason not to support them. Sometimes, all we need to know is that our counterpart is there for us, with a smile on their face.

Another Angle:

When you are doing “something for them”, do it with a smile, because we know when you are miserable. And don’t criticize the event and put in your $.02 of how it could have been done better.

And my final thought right here before Valentine’s Day…

4. Don’t Emotionally Distance Yourself After a Fight.

There are so many ways you can “make up” after a fight. Don’t get your feelings so hurt and your feathers so ruffled that you miss out on those “joyous” moments you could be spending with your spouse. Many folks distance themselves after a fight for hours, even days; all communication and physical contact is shut off. Nothing is so big that you should choose to not speak to or touch your spouse…I promise. Things will never get worked out between the two of you if you shut down.

Another Angle:

Always communicate your feelings or emotions, even if it hurts the other person’s feelings for a short time. They will get over it, but they need to know what you are feeling. And always tell them how much you love them, even if things get ugly. Love doesn’t die that quickly…I promise.

As I mentioned this is definitely a “two-parter” for me, but I just thought this article was dead on and had so many valid points. So I wanted to share them with you all, during the season of love. 

But remember; when a relationship ends…take something away from it. What your flaws are, what their flaws were, where you could have improved…it’s a two way street and there are always two sides to every story.

**The thoughts and ideas were taken from an article, 16 Ways I Blew My Marriage, by Dan Pearce.

The White Spot

In the Tree House: The White Spot

By: Samantha S. Daviss

Whether you keep track of your life and your activities electronically via your phone calendar, or your electronic organizer; or you are like me, an “old fashioned” gal that still likes to flip through the pages of her calendar and see all the highlights, mark-outs, and checks; our lives just seem to keep filling up with more and more activities.

Some of these events are for fun, maybe a lunch with a friend, or a spa day just to relax. Or some of those events are all work related…appointments, meetings, presentations, or work related travel requirements that may pull you away from your family for a few days. Or quite possibly, some of those events marked in your calendar aren’t so fun, like a visit to the doctor that you have been dreading…you know something is wrong, but you have put it of until you just can’t anymore. Or maybe one of those little squares is filled with some pretty exciting events, like the birth of your baby, your mom’s 90^th birthday, celebrating your 50^th wedding anniversary with the love of your life, or the grandkids are coming in for a nice long visit.

What ever the case may be, our lives and calendars fill up before our very eyes. There are circles, or squares, or highlights to designate certain things. My personal calendar looks like a highlighter rainbow has taken residence in it. Between my personal schedule, the three boys, my work schedule and my husband’s schedule, we are each assigned a highlighter color, so you can only imagine what the inside of my day planner looks like.

And the sad part of it is I can’t go to be at night or wake up in the morning without double checking it first, to make sure I haven’t overlooked something or forgotten to do something. I realize that all these activities and events in our lives are what make up our lives; they are the reasons we get out of bed in the morning. They are the things we look forward to, or quite possibly dread. But regardless or why we are doing them, these are the reasons we keep moving forward each and every day.

But don’t you just love it when there is that one day…once in a blue moon, but yes that one day where there is a “White Spot” in your calendar. Now I don’t know how you react, but sometimes that “White Spot” freaks me out just a little bit. It catches me off guard; I am not sure what to do with myself, when I have nothing written in the calendar.

I sit and I think, “Did I forget to write something down?”, “Did I miss something?”, or “Surely there is somewhere or something I need to be doing!” It’s sad really, when we don’t know how to react to that “White Spot”.

But after having run across a few in my time, I have learned to relish in them…”Carpe Diem”. Seize the Day, as we would say. Whether it’s snatching the kids up to go play outside, or staying in bed all day watching good ol’ black and white movies or catching up on some much needed laundry. Whatever the case may be…it’s YOUR day, so take advantage of it; and don’t let anyone try to tell you that you have “wasted your time”, because to me…time alive and happy is time well spent.

And if you do choose to spend that day on yourself, don’t even look back or feel guilty about it. We never seem to get enough “White Spots” in our lives.

So along those lines, if you find yourself cruising along through life, going through the motions of activities, homework, sporting events, parties, work appointments, doctor appointments without having run across a single “White Spot” in a while; then you need to sit down and re-evaluate your calendar and create your own “White Spot”.

Not only is it good for your health, but it’s good for your soul too. It is very, very important that we think of ourselves, and “Reset” everything back to zero. Our minds, our hearts, and our bodies get so overloaded sometimes that we forget to just clear everything out and reset ourselves so we are able to continue through life with a smile, and be thankful for what we have been given.

So when you do come across that “White Spot” in your calendar, don’t go looking for something to do, or think your are some sort of “loser” for not having anything planned…being alone or catching up with yourself is a good thing…so relish in this precious time you have been given.

Pat Down from Hell

In the Tree House: Pat Down from Hell

By: Samantha S. Daviss

Another adventure, another trip, another encounter with TSA under our belts…so it’s time once again to sit back be oh so thankful you weren’t with us!

Our family decided to take a quick trip up to the Rocky Mountains recently, to try and beat some of this Texas heat. But by family trip I mean, I got to travel with all three kids, all by myself for the very first time…so you see, this is going to be a good one…

 Our daddy/my husband was working, but he was flying into Denver later that evening to meet us there, but in the mean time “Good ol’ Mom” braved the adventure on her own.

So everything was going great. The packing went smoothly; I got myself and the two babies in one large duffle bag for five whole days; and our oldest in a smaller duffle bag. Not too bad if I do say so myself.

                Sidebar: I think if there were a degree from a university in packing, cramming, sitting, stretching, and all together maneuvering luggage so it will hold everything you need…I would have a gosh darn PhD in it.

And I did it all in a timely manner, I started about four days before our trip, so I wasn’t stressed or panicked, and I knew everything was washed and ready to go. And trip day finally arrived!! We had a fairly early flight; it was around 9:30 that morning. So for most normal people, that can just throw their clothes on, grab their bags and head out the door, that’s not too much of a challenge—but a mother of three boys, who all they want to do is sleep and eat…it’s a challenge. So I got everyone up and charged at around 6am for a 6:45am departure from our driveway. Leaving us plenty of time to park and check in at Love Field, which is just an hour from our house.

We were all so excited. One last fun family vacation before the end of summer, and we were getting to see our daddy that night. So everyone was in a great mood and super excited. Once clothes were on, breakfasts were eaten, we were on the road. We missed our departure time by about 10 minutes, so not too bad for a dumb ol’ girl and three monkeys.

All was well until we hit the outskirts of downtown Dallas. As my oldest used to call it when he was younger…”stinky town”, because of the sewage plant just as you enter the city. And that is my landmark reference, which is where the traffic was stopped!!! So needless to say I had about another 30 to 45 minutes until I reached the airport. And the clock was ticking.

We finally arrived; and what seemed to take an hour, found a parking spot in the garage; with only 45 minutes to spare until our flight left. So I was frantic. I strapped everyone into their strollers, and car seat carriers. My middle son was in this really cool device that you could attach his car seat to, and it turned it into a stroller. Well is wasn’t so cool, when my oldest was running to keep up with me and the poor baby got tumped out onto his head on the concrete of Love Field’s parking garage. But he took it like a man and the motley crew kept running.

Now picture this…it’s not just me and three boys running; it’s me;  three boys; one double stroller; another in a car seat stroller;  a huge diaper bag; another huge carry-on bag for snacks, toys and games; the youngest baby’s car seat; and two pieces of luggage. (Seeing the picture yet—still glad you aren’t with us, huh?)

We make it to check in. I am sweaty like a pig (yes folks sweating, not glistening like some Hollywood starlet, SWEATING). I check us all in, and the guy doesn’t see the baby (who is a lap child) to check in, because he is blocked and hidden in the stroller by the two massive bags. So after TSA sends us all the way back to check-in, to retrieve our boarding pass for the baby, we now (literally) have 10 minutes to get through TSA and R-U-N to our gate (still with a stroller, two big bags, and a car seat in tow).

We send our bags through the X-ray machine and of course as usual they have to check my diaper bag like 100 times. But that is no surprise to me.

But there has been a turn of events, the TSA lady pulls me to the side, and literally starts patting me down in places, I didn’t know I had (because I look pretty dangerous with three kids, two diaper bags, and a stroller). At this point I was balling crocodile tears down my face because we were going to miss our flight, and I kept telling her over and over, but she kept going slower and slower.

So she continued with my pat down, and by the time she finished, I felt like I needed to smoke a cigarette, she got that personal with me.

But while I was being rubbed down like Ana in Fifty Shades of Grey, the sweetest lady asked me what gate we were leaving out of…and she said she would tell the flight attendant we were stuck at TSA, but we were coming.

Once I was released from the jaws of TSA hell, we were all four on the move again…running like I have never run before. And as we arrived at the gate, the sweet lady that told the stewardess we were coming, met me back halfway down the hallway to tell me the flight had been delayed an hour!

I had never been so happy of a late flight in my entire life. I started crying all over again, like a baby, and she and I embraced in the middle of the Love Field terminal (yep, never seen her before in my life; and we are hugging like sisters). So after we collected ourselves, changed into fresh diapers (the babies, not me); it was time to board.

And yes again folks, I had my typical 10am (airplane) cocktail to start my trip out right. Here’s to travelling with the Daviss circus.

Moms vs. CEOs

In the Tree House: Moms vs. CEOs

By: Samantha S Daviss

It dawned on me the other day that as a mother I do more before 9am than a CEO of a multi-national corporation does before he has his first cup of coffee in his high rise office overlooking Central Park.

I would pay good money to see a CEO balance and manage half the stuff a mother has to balance and manage on a daily basis, without loosing his cool (or having a cocktail before noon).

A normal day is to get the oldest up and ready for school, while making his breakfast and emptying out the dishwasher for the first of three loads that will occur that day. Then heading in to the laundry room to make sure all the clothes are dried and folded and put away where they belong. Then somewhere in there the little one gets up and is immediately ready for his breakfast, after changing his dirty diaper.

So while he is eating his breakfast in his hi-chair, I manage to start the coffee pot, so I can savor my cup of coffee while running out the door to take the oldest to school. But in the meantime, I am running back to my room to make the bed, start the laundry, pick out my clothes for work that day, and plug in my hot rollers.

Then moments later the sounds of the third set of feet sneak around the corner, wanting his sippy cup of milk and breakfast. So his diaper is removed, where again the potty training commences for that day, then a fresh pull-up is put on him. And he too is set in his chair for his breakfast. All the while, I am reminding the oldest if he brushed his teeth, brushed his hair, made his bed.

Then once everyone is done, we load up in the car to take Big Bubba to school for the day. And on the way home I manage to make a phone call to the doctor to schedule the youngest’s regular check up; return the phone call from the dentist verifying that we will all be at the dentist appointment that afternoon; then send myself an email to call the vet to make an appointment and to call the plumber for the leaky faucet.

And at this point in my day it’s only 8am. So we have many, many more hours to go. Once Bubba is dropped off then the babies and I head home to enjoy our ritualistic morning walk, so mommy can try to have a little personal time and lose some of the baby weight still looming on her bones.

After the walk we get home and mommy finishes up all the laundry that is slowly piling up; quickly changes into her work clothes, and readies the babies for their days.

Then once in the car, I think maybe I get to sit and relax and enjoy some alone time and a little music on the way to work; but then my reminder alarm goes off that I need to call the plumber and the vet. But in between those calls, the husband calls and reminds me to run by the dry cleaners to pick up his clothes for work. So I guess so much for a relaxing ride to work.

Then I realize that I have about three pending work phone calls that need to be made before I actually step foot in the office, so as I am unloading from the car and riding the elevator up to the office, I am still doing work.

And look…it’s only 9:30am….whewwww. And this doesn’t include the list I have made for myself to do at lunch to round out the family’s needs for the rest of the week, or the birthday parties on the weekend, or the out of town plans we may have coming up.

So take that multi-national CEO of one of the largest corporations America has to offer…I’d like to see you keep up with M.O.M.

The joys of raising kids, working, being independent and self-reliant are all worth it…if you can do it with a smile. And that’s just what I do…I take it all with a grain of salt. I wouldn’t know what to do with myself if I actually did get to slow down.

Just Say Thank You

In the Tree House: Just Say Thank You

By: Samantha S. Daviss

Well we had another exciting airport adventure. This trip was short and sweet though, nonetheless, we got to battle TSA, again.

I’m thinking I am going to create signs to pin on my family that say “One year old with sippy cup, blanket, and pacifier, no drugs or bombs in his diaper or milk”; “Two year old with sippy cup, cowboy boots, and no explosives in his milk or boots”…you get the idea. I think it would make the line and process go much smoother, what do you think?

I feel like sometimes it might just be easier to lay the kids down on the conveyor belt and send them through the X-ray machine and get it over and done with; and not to mention the fact that they have to wand my entire body, and rub those little clothe things on my hands to see if I have handled any explosive devices. Only device I have handled that may explode is my mind.

However, after TSA scanned my diaper bag 4 times, yes 4 times, and ran the milk through the X-ray 3 times and tested the contents we were finally sent on our way. I really am not complaining about the job TSA has to do, I just find it humorous that it is about a 30 minute process for me every time I go through. So I go in with a positive attitude and stay friendly with all the agents, because there is nothing I can do to speed it up. But like they say “Better be safe, than sorry”; and after 9/11 I am willing to tolerate anything these days to keep my family and country safe.

So with that said, the boys and I wander down to our gate where we settle ourselves in by the window so they can observe all the planes coming and going and all of the trucks loading and unloading the airplanes. The baby is in that stage of life where he walks up to people and just stares at them; doesn’t really say “Hi” or wave to them, just stares as if he is taking in their presence, and just observing them in general.

After a few minutes of occupying the entire area by ourselves, a nice quiet young man comes and sits down next to me. I really wasn’t paying attention to who he was or what he was wearing, due to the fact that my head was on a pivot trying to wrangle my boys and keep them near me. When all of the sudden the baby comes running up to me, and passes me by a few steps and just stops to stare at the young man sitting next to me; which of course caused me to turn and look at him.

He was dressed in full military camouflage with his assigned military backpack resting at his feet. As the baby just stared at him, I told him to say “Hi” to the young man, but he just kept staring, which in turn made the soldier smile and giggle a little to himself.

A few moments later our seating area was called to board the flight, so I gathered all of our belongings together and loaded the boys on the plane. And home we went.

That evening as I was lying in bed, and I’m not sure why, but the vision of that quiet young man popped into my head. So I started thinking to myself, where was he headed? Was he getting to go home? Was he being shipped out again after time spent with his family over the holidays? Was he starting basic training? I wondered what the future held for him.

Then I became very disappointed in myself. I couldn’t believe I missed such a wonderful opportunity, to teach my son the value of what that young man is doing for his (my son’s) freedom and way of life. I was so upset that I didn’t tell my one-year old to say “Thank You” to that soldier instead of “Hi”. And I was even more disappointed in myself for not saying “Thank You”.

If you think about it, it really is such a simple gesture. Really no other words or follow-up explanation is required. Our soldiers know exactly what you mean when you say a simple “Thank You” to them.

They know you are thanking them for laying their lives on the line for total and complete strangers all over the United States, daily. They know you are thanking them for spending months, upon years away from their families and loved ones. They know you are thanking them for all the early mornings of training and long days of preparation that they endure on a constant basis. But most importantly, they know you are thanking them for who they are and the sacrifices they are making for every single one of us.

It would have been so simple and selfless of me to tell my little boy to thank the nice soldier man sitting next to mommy, instead of “Hi”; because that “Thank You” would have meant the world to us all.

So just remember, when you pass one of our military personnel on the street, in the airport, or in the grocery store…it’s simple, just smile and say “Thank You.”