Tell them how you feel

By: Samantha S. Daviss

I have said it before, but showing your emotions is not a bad thing. In fact it reminds those in your life just how you feel about them, and where they stand in your thoughts and heart on a daily basis. If you show them in a joyful and positive manner, then they know you love them and how important they are to you. But if you show them in a negative style, then they will have nothing to feed off of other than uncertainty and destructive actions from you.

Recently one of my closest friends in the entire world almost lost her mom to a tragic car accident. Sadly the other driver did lose their life; and this accident happened in the blink of an eye. The two drivers were each going to their respective places of work, just minding their own business on a sunny Monday afternoon. But the next thing the two of them knew, was that their lives, and their family’s lives had been changed forever.

This woman (my friend’s mom) is a fighter, and I have no doubt that this tragedy will not put her under. But she was considered in serious condition at the scene of the accident and for a while after at the hospital. I know in my heart, she never woke up that morning, giving it a second thought whether or not she should go to work, for fear her life (and one of a total stranger) would forever be changed.

But you see, it was changed…they both were…forever. So the importance of never leaving the house angry, or sad, or with any sort of ambiguity between you and your loved ones is so important. It is actually an unwritten rule that we should all follow on a daily basis. Tell those around you just how much you love them. Watch how you speak to those around you…your tone carries a lot of weight with others. Think about how your actions or decisions may affect or hurt those around you. And really think hard to yourself, is that issue really worth arguing about…or berating the other person about? In the big scheme of things, probably not.

Too many bad things are happening in today’s society, too often. We are all moving too fast and missing the big picture of life. Just the other day it was in the news that a few schools in our surrounding areas had received bomb threats. So who would have woken up that morning thinking their child was in danger…certainly not the parents of Sandy Hook elementary school (almost two years ago). I am not sure what is happening with our society today. I know bad things and wrong choices have always been made since the dawn of time. But society today just feels so disconnected from each other. We are managing to hurt each other’s feelings through numerous portals of social media, and the sad part about that is, no one seems to realize we are hurting or damaging the emotions of others around us. Everyone just says and does things flippantly on social media these days without a second thought to the repercussions it may have on those around them.

It may not be intentional damage being done, but nonetheless it is being done. So that to me is why it is so very important to tell those around you just how you feel about them. Tell them you miss them. Tell them you love them. Tell them just how much they mean to you, and how they have impacted your life.

Start looking for the good in everyone around you, instead of ridiculing and pinpointing the negative. This world is a great big beautiful place covered in millions of interesting and fascinating people, and we all need to just learn to embrace one another.

So the next time your kid does something that bugs you, try to talk it out with them and not stay angry. The next time your BFF rubs you the wrong way…let them know it. Don’t hold that animosity inside, because you will, over time, start to resent them. And if something were to happen, you don’t want your final memories of them to be feelings of exasperation.

And for some reason the people that are closest to us are the ones we seem to lash out at the most. I guess it is because of a comfort level that we have with them. We feel we can say or do anything to them, and their unconditional love for us will always be there. But that is the furthest from the truth. 

Be the kindest to those closest to you, especially the one you share a bed with. Because after all, they are the one you wake up to every morning, the one you chose to share your life with, and the one you will regret losing the most (especially if your last words were ill-spoken).

Don’t think showing your emotions is silly or puerile; because there may come a day that you won’t get to hold that person, love that person, and tell that person just how much they have meant to you.